Our Homesteading Goals and Concerns

As a devout atheist and a Women’s Studies minor, my wife Kate Lynn has a general distrust of religion, supplanted by a spiritual connection with the Earth, the natural forces she can see and feel. She’s a magnificent pagan-in-progress, a firm believer in Mother Nature as an all-powerful, feminine energy (she ain't skeered of snakes, for instance).

When we moved to this house in Charlottesville, the owners had a sign on the edge of the half-hidden driveway that read “Shanti Bagh,” which means either “garden of peace” or “audience with a tiger,” depending on what website you ask.

We considered all those sprawling Virginia horse farms and estates, each boasting a name on a custom sign hung at the end of a tree-lined drive.

“So, we now officially own land in Virginia,” I said to Kate Lynn. “Do we have to rename our property?”

“Sure,” Kate Lynn said, not pausing. “But it should probably be something like ‘Thunderbird Disco.’

Done. That was that. Cousins Jason and Heather gifted us a custom driveway sign with mountains and deer antlers burned in, framing the words: “Welcome to Thunderbird Disco. Est. 2013.” But to honor the original name, we started calling our new Project, “Audience With a Tiger,” or “Tiger Project,” for short. This was before Tiger King swept the nation, but whatever.

When I told Kate about my idea for the Tiger Project—a combination of homesteading and prepping—she was decidedly on the fence. She’s not alarmist, not focused on climate change, not into the prepper movement nor all that often accompanies it.

“Either something massive will happen and Mother Nature will throw us off, in which case there’s nothing we can do,” she once said to me. “Or else, people much smarter than us will figure out how to fix things, in which case we’ll get through it.”

Still, here's why she might be into it, and here are her concerns…

KATE’s CONCERNS

"Number 1: That you’ll become a nutcase, Adam. A full-blown, gun-hoarding, backwoods nutcase.”

Number 2: I’m worried we’ll accidentally destroy our house and property, that we'll do more harm than good and ultimately go broke on things that don’t actually help the planet or make our lives better, easier, or more fun. Creating an underground bunker and filling it with bottled water and batteries is not going to appreciably improve our daily lives. ... And just, you know, there’s our general limits of time and money.”

“You’re right,” I said. “We don’t have the budget to just throw money at this, and at the same time we can’t do it DIY everything a shoestring budget. To do this right, we’ll need to invest in this work the same way we’d invest in college funds or a 401k. It might have more value in the long-term, anyway.”

Number 3: I’m worried that it’ll ultimately take more time away from our kids. That we—or at least you—will get mired in the project management and hands-on work and creative output of this Project and end up getting consumed and spending less time with us.”

Time is the great, scarce commodity in our household, and it’s the crux of what we argue about most often. We—all four of us really—are hard workers, social animals, and creative beings. Kate and I both have demanding full time jobs we care about, we both have side projects we enjoy, we both need our creative outlets, and we’re both committed to being close with our kids and extended families and ever-growing networks of friends. It’s partly due to how we were raised—you can have it all!—but it’s a stressful juggling act that leaves little spare time or mental space.

But so much of our stress has been due, I think, to us both being pulled outward, in too many directions. I see the Tiger Project as a potential way to come back home, literally, together. I hope I'm right.

HER GOALS

Number 1: I want more meaningful time with our kids and to engage them in projects they feel proud of. I’m down with them knowing how to grow cucumbers or rebuild a carburetor.”

Number 2: I want to lower our carbon footprint. I agree we’re living in an unsustainable way and doing bad things to the planet. I’m inspired by Greta Thunberg and all the young people pushing us to make changes on a human scale, while we’re waiting, possibly in vain, for some big systemic change or clear direction from older people who don’t give a fuck.”

Number 3: I want to feel closer to nature and live in a more intentional way. We decided to move to the woods instead of another city, and there’s so many home projects we talked about. We should take advantage of living where we live. We should do more DIY stuff rather than paying others to do it for us. I feel like we inherited this extremely beautiful, intentional piece of property and while we didn’t Beetlejuice it, we accidentally Miss Havisham-ed it.”

“And Number 4: I want to save money and lower our cost of living. That’s what I want."

I share all this to remind you all and remind myself that at the outset of the Tiger Project, neither Kate nor I are insane. We have our doubts, are thinking it through. We're approaching it with open eyes, open hearts, the best of intentions, a sense of humor. We’ll obviously need lots of help to make all of this happen. We know how to do very little ourselves.

Luckily, we know good people.

IN SUMMARY…

KATE’S CONCERNS

  • Losing time with our kids

  • Destroying our home/property

  • Going broke

  • Our (my) general sanity

KATE’S GOALS

  • Spending more quality time with our kids

  • Lowering our carbon footprint

  • Feeling closer to nature

  • Decreasing cost of living

Adam Nemett
Adam Nemett spent 10+ years researching doomsday preppers, homesteading, and communal living for his novel WE CAN SAVE US ALL (named one of Booklist's "Top Ten Debut Novels of 2018"). Now, he's transforming that research into reality, documenting his family's journey toward self-reliance through permaculture and sustainable living. His writing has appeared in The New York Times, Rolling Stone, and Salon. When not experimenting with homesteading alongside his wife Kate Lynn and their children, Adam serves as Director of Brand and Content Strategy for WillowTree, bringing his storytelling expertise to digital technology. Follow his ongoing projects at AdamNemett.com.
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